_____(TS)Privacy is like the wind; it comes and it goes. (CM)You can catch it, but it will only get away in the future. (CM)Some people need privacy, and some people don’t need privacy. (CS)In chapter five of To Kill A Mockingbird, privacy is a necessity to Jem and Dill when they are contemplating pranks and schemes.
_____(TS)To have privacy is a hard thing; there is always someone who will try to find out all your secrets. (SD)In the book To Kill A Mockingbird by Harper Lee, privacy is taking place in many places such as in Jem's tree house. (CM)Jem and Dill were spending “most of their time together in the tree house plotting and planning,” and they would only let Scout in if they needed her; otherwise, she was not allowed to share in their secrets. (CM)Scout later gave up because Jem and Dill wanted their privacy badly. (SD)One day, Scout was sitting with Miss Maudie, a wise old woman, and they were talking about Boo Radley, saying he probably had many secrets in his house that were kept private. (CM)“What happens in houses behind closed doors, what secrets—,” those few words left them wondering, what was in the house and what was he keeping private? (CM)Boo Radley is known by all, and unknown by all (antithesis). (SD)On one of Jem and Dills brilliant schemes, Scout comes and helps them keep lookout while they try to give a note to Boo Radley, but unfortunately, Atticus comes and tells them to stop. (CM)Atticus feels that if Boo “[…] wanted to come out, he would,” but if he “wanted to stay inside free from the attentions […]” from the rest of the people in Maycomb, he should be allowed. (CM)Atticus also thinks that even if Boo seems cool and mysterious, he should be able to have his privacy. (CS)Privacy can be hard to obtain; many people work hard to get it, such as Boo Radley, but many people also try to stop it and expose the person’s secrets, such as Jem and Dill.
_____(TS)Every now and then, I will yearn for diminutive moments of privacy. (SD)A few days ago during my dad’s band practice, the singer brought two young kids over because she could not find a baby sitter. (CM)All the kids wanted to do was play video games, but I did not know that they would get so excited; they immediately started screaming and running around. (CM)Then they started playing with the computer I was doing my homework on so I had to start over on my mom’s computer and all I wanted was some privacy. (SD)Earlier, during the summer, I was playing with my friend, when his neighbor came up and wanted to play. (CM)The neighbor would not leave, a stranger with a round and plump body (appositive closer). (CM)This was like when Jem and Dill “spent the days together in the tree house plotting and planning,” and they would only allow Scout in if they needed her to help in their private plots. (SD)One morning, I was on a short jog when I saw a man, privately sleeping in his backyard. (CM)All of a sudden, he was hit in the head with a water balloon thrown by two kids and we got soaked. (CM)This is the same as when Scout, Jem, and Dill were trying to put the note in the Radley house, they were intruding on his personal space and privacy. (CS)Everyone will enjoy privacy while they have it, but when it is gone, they will eagerly try to get it back.
_____
TS: Always no privacy
SD: During band practice, 2 kids came over
CM: Singers kids playing video games, excitedly jumping and cheering
CM: Kept running and playing with computer I was using
SD: Playing with friend
CM: Did not want to include neighbor
CM: Jem and Dill planning, not want Scout
SD: On run and see man sleeping
CM: Two kids come up and nail him with a water balloon
CM: Like Jem, Scout, and Dill putting note in Radley house
CS: Everyone can enjoy privacy, not many get it
3 comments:
Colin,
1) In your first body paragraph I do not see your antithesis.
2) The title To Kill A Mocking Bird should always be italicized (in some sentences it is not).
3) I really enjoyed reading your topic sentence in your second body paragraph.
Colin, I agree with all of Simone's comments (where's the antithesis?), and I want to add a comment about this phrase: "we got soaked". It's not clear why you would get soaked, just jogging past the yard. Perhaps you could explain that more thoroughly.
Also, watch for little mistakes. I saw a number of them.
GOOD LUCK.
Hey colin,
I think To Kill A Mocking Bird should be in Italics.
Your first paragraph is really good and keeps the readers attention.
Also Im not sure you spelled "Baby sitter" right.
Post a Comment